#poetrycommunity – Enna Mari

Violence Ended Delights by Enna Mari [Based on Chloe Gong’s Duology]

MAJOR SPOILERS for These Violent Delights and Our Violent Ends by Chloe Gong.

Violence Ended Delights by Enna Mari [Based on Chloe Gong's Duology] 

Our streets run red,
But our hearts in shreds, 
The love that was meant to hold,
Received, what was meant to be told,
It’s forbidden and lost,
But we wondered at what cost,
The hate that lined the lanes,
A monster going quite insane, 
Rampaged and killed someway,
Bugs dug the brain preparing to stay,
As streets line with chaos,
We stand without remorse,
We were grown and sold,
Working to be as good as the old,
Hoping we will be great enough,
Perhaps they are, they are rough,
Silk tided after a knockout,
The intention to kill was without,
Surprised, yet a trigger was aimed,
They were then brought, shamed,
Panic and love grows within, 
Someone was about to win,
A sacrifice was going to be made,
Someone was shot, becoming a fade,
No one could know of the blood spilled,
Of family and the next heir killed,
The rules broken, a stunned moment,
A forgotten friend, the component,
Shocked and struck the love turns,
A forced conversation churns,
While city undergoes revolution, 
We said the words with absolution, 
No more leaving, together at last,
A time just as short as the past, 
A fire of sacrifice, a claim of life,
Façade of safety and a security strife,
They ended by laying side by side,
Names carved in stone, but everything feels lied.

Violence Ended Delights is a poem I wrote quite a while ago on Chloe Gong’s duology: These Violent Delights and Our Violent Ends. I wrote this before Foul Lady Fortune so I did not know anything that might happen to any of the characters in the duology. The main reason I wanted to write it was due to the way Chloe wrote the books, her writing style is so unique and beautiful, as well as her overall storylines which are delightfully composed. I also loved her books and this was a way I could spotlight them. Although the poem is quite long, longer in length than what I usually would write, it hardly capture the duology but those who have read it will understand the very niche references.

Life like Water by Enna Mari

Life like Water

There are days when everything feels simply,
Almost like a glass of clear fresh water,
But then we remember water is complex,
So much depth, so nourishing yet dangerous,
It can take anything anywhere,
Change lives and cause deadly deaths,
Yet we hang to it for dear life,
Acknowledging everything good and evil,
So why can’t people do that about me?
They only choose to see the side of the
Smile filled face, fresh of tears,
Ignoring everything wrong 
Even when I’m close to the edge, 
With nothing left but a cry for help,
They laugh at the ridiculous thought of it,
Why see it when my problems aren’t 
Affecting their lifestyle in any way.

“Life like Water” is an original poem written by me, like the poem’s title suggests it uses the versatility of water to follow the thoughts of someone longing to be needed and seen, due to their struggles, and it feels lonely. It emphasises the need to be make an impact on the people around them to have a sense of accomplishment to the point where the person does not care if it is helping someone achieve something negative or positive. It captures the emotions many may feel of wanting to make an impact, even if they are surrounded by love.

The last half of the poem focuses on the way some may perceive others, those who are absorbed in themselves or simply do not care for the subject of the poem. The person is crying out for help, whether that be emotional support or something else, but their invisibility is being highlighted so the person acknowledges they are not the people they should seek and returns to wearing a mask.

A Mother’s Fear (the innocence of a child) by Enna Mari

Anger sparks within her eyes, 
Flooded with colours of the night,
A broken shield made of lies, 
Gives the child, a big fright. 

Now a sound, a wail, a weep,
The Mother tries to calm the little sheep,
"Hush," she whispers as she prays,
Hoping the child won't run away.

This is part two of the poems that are based/inspired by William Blake’s “Songs of Innocence and Experience.” Unlike the first one, this one is more explicitly obvious that it draws from Blake’s poetry, especially focusing on the naivety of the child where the simple actions of an adult can frighten it.

Though it is not what I usually write in regard to poetry, it is still not too bad. I personally prefer “The Differences” more, perhaps it is because it may be based off myself. Like the previous William Blake inspired poem, it was written for a school assignment and has an accompanied analysis. If any of you are interested, let me know and I’ll attach it. 😊

The Differences by Enna Mari

Sharp slitted eyes, 
Face made of slides, 
Features as round as thee. 

A beautiful smile, 
Kind-Hearted child, 
The world will see you differently.

This poem was written at school for an assignment. The task involved using the themes depicted in William Blake’s poetry, “The songs of Innocence.” I did previously write about certain literary techniques used and the brief analysis of some of the lines, but I thought that may not be something of interest [although if it is let me know and I’ll put it up]. But for now, I’ll leave this without a clear conclusive definition of the meaning and so it is yours to interpret.

Haikus based on How We Fall Apart by Katie Zhao.

Appearance was perfect 
Nothing left, a Web of lies 
Alone yet never 

Nobody knew it 
Unknown, everyone struggling  
Mentally harmful 

Betray or study
Completed both, almost died 
Forgiven at last

I wrote these Haikus a while ago and I realised I never posted them on my blog. The simple format of haikus really lets you understand the basic message and sometimes simple is best. There is beauty to be found in the bare and of course my first book based poems had to be on How We Fall Apart by Katie Zhao.

Anxiety, please stop by Enna Mari

No one understands you,
No one cares about you,
Everything hates you.

No one likes you,
No one wants to know about you,
Everyone despises you, 

Those little thoughts 
Cause large accidents,
Spiralling down,
As shadows wrap
Around and around 
The brain never stops
A light laughter 
Can be seen as cruel,
Harsh, ruthless, callous
Just words and so is this. 
Anxiety, please stop.

Anxiety, please stop was written a couple months ago after an anxiety attack and it clearly explores something many people unfortunately go through with self-sabotaging thoughts. After I wrote I didn’t edit it that much since I thought it would be best to be left as it was giving it the property of how it felt in those moments.

I hope you enjoyed the poem and the simple structure of it, perhaps you might have found it relatable.

They Know Nothing as They Tell Lies by Enna Mari

They tell me I’m fine,
They think I am not, 
They comment on parts that matter a lot,
From struggles of health to unsolicited advice, 
They think they have rights to tell me what’s what,
The surface of tension and other things right,
They give me a smile with no one in sight.
From lovesick stares to stolen moments,
They took what they thought were just more tokens, 
Not a thought about the others,
They didn’t consider the people involved. 

A rose so red it couldn’t be friendship, 
They told me it was nothing to do with relationships,
Then many weeks later they declared their love,
I was confused with the man in the house,
Yet here I am walking beside them,
While some hatred still lingers and festers inside me,
Although they don’t know the secrets I’ve learnt,
Or the [long held] words of despair so deeply burnt,
They think I’m still an ignorant little “girl”
With tears spent out and the lows forgotten.

They are not ready for the person they’ve given,
They don’t know the secrets I’ve hidden,
Or the setting feeling of impending doom,
And it’s just while I sit in my room,
I know that I will never say those words,
But I can't say I dying to know,
Why they would say such a thing, 
To hide the lies and miscommunication, 
Although some many deny, 
It’s clear there was a dalliance all along.

Words by Enna Mari

Words

Help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help, help.
Hoping saying the words makes it true.

Alone, depressive, monsters, anxiety, hurt, inner voice, a broken heart, nothing, empty, shivers, nerves, self, words, silent screams.
Something I truly know, as close as friends.

Fine, okay, happy, book reader, smart, thriving, going through a rough patch, understanding, empathic, speak up, know it all, great student, part of four.
A farced played by me and blurred by others.

Smile, anxious, internalised, glimpse, angry, understood, enough, never truly, tired, wonderful student, reader, wise, gives, takes, allies.
Something they see but I’ve filtered it all.

Gapes, sad, confused, dislike, hate, lonely, never, why, difficulty, know, a mess, trying, climbing but falling, cruel, harsh, tough, fragile, broken.
Negative but true, something I've excepted.

Fantastic, wonderful, great, good, well, fine, okay, bad, surviving, alive, lost.
Starting with the biggest lie.

I wrote this poem recently, I know, some people might not consider it to be a poem but it’s up to you to decide what you think of it. It is quite a dark poem and yes, in case you are wondering I’m okay. I called it words [it’s quite self-explanatory] because of repeated words and just words in general. Apoligies for the format, I’m still learning.

From a single smile by Enna Mari

From a single smile

Still the past bites and crawls,
Haunting me to the end with gore,
Bleeding and hurting forever more,
One action led to the end of it all,
It started with a single smile,
After running a hundred miles,
Though they knew what they were doing,
Nobody saw where they were going,
Leaving the rest in the dust,
It filled the admirers with lust,
Unexpected surprises were to come,
Led to the battle of internal war,
Against themselves and against the law,
With no help or support,
The shell of hardness began to grow,
Never letting the others fully in.

This poem was written by me. I wrote it a year or so ago. The poem is about a friendship “break up” and how trauma can affect someone. This particular friendship involved another person who was quite close to me and even three years later I was still hurt by it. Nothing extremely dramatic happened, on the outside we had looked like two best friends who had a fall out. But behind closed door it was deeper than that. I do not know if this person intentionally hurt me, but on multiple occasions they have done things that were quite upsetting especially when I reflect on the past. I currently don’t have any hard feelings towards them as I have grown from this experience, but I would certainly say I have had bitter feelings in the past. We made countless wonderful memories together and I am grateful for it, she was my best friend but I’m not sure if she felt the same way throughout the entirety of the friendship. I considered this as a friendship break up because I continued to try and stay in touch when we started to drift apart, but one-sided relationships never work. In a way I wasn’t surprised especially since the whole event came with a change, a transition from primary to high school. I received a book on my birthday, she pulled me aside and gave me a book on how to make friends. Although I was a shy child, I have improved immensely throughout the years and looking back it hurt more than it should have. I requested we stayed friends, whether it was best friends it didn’t matter, I couldn’t let the person who knew the most about me go. It is clear now that she was suggesting we weren’t going to be close friends from the reluctant nature in her voice. Ignorant little me thought it was a nice and thoughtful gift. How I was wrong.

I hope in this poem you find your own meaning and even find it relatable. Friendships can be complicated and even more so when involving life changing situations.

If you are going through a rough patch specifically to do with friends, just know you will find your people it takes time, but it will happen and don’t under value yourself, don’t let others use you. You are worth so much more.