The Lies We Tell by Katie Zhao Trigger warning: Stalking, murder, hate crime, racism, kidnapping. Age rating:14+ Overall rating: 4.75 out of 5 Gernes: Young Adult, Mystery. A spoiler free summary Anna wants to start a new at her local university. She wants to excel academically and create new friendships, all while ignoring her childhood academic rival, Chris Lu. But there is another reason which has brought her here, the unsolved murder of her former babysitter enraptures her in morbid fascination. When the Lu bakery is attacked, Anna links it to the unsolved crime and she can’t help but feel its underlining motives and is forcefully drawn to Chris. After feeling threatened and no longer comfortable in her own school, the two come together to figure out who and what is behind these targeted attacks. Review I quite enjoyed this novel, rather simple in its nature but appreciated that it discussed heavy themes that are incredibly relevant today. The beginning of the novel was more on the slower side and the real mystery began about one third of the way through. The two main characters, Anna and Chris are very likable and were especially relatable to me. I loved seeing the representation in the novel but also with the dark and sad side that comes with living in a country such as America where being Asian is the minority. As the story follows a string of hate crimes, from murder to stalking, it reflects the spike in hate crimes against people of Asian descent during beginning the covid pandemic [and onwards]. Katie incorporated real life situations that everyone has lived through/seen on social media. She shines a light on these issues through a dark novel and reveals the fear some of us may have. It pulls focus to it and for especially people who have never been a minority shows the thinking and inner feelings of the characters, which is unfortunately still very relevant today. Though some may disagree, I appreciated that romance did not play a major role in the story, although the blurb was a little miss leading. The parents of Anna and Chris were not forgotten and are some of the primary characters in this story, it thoroughly explores the stereotypical expectations and the inner rivalry to achieve the best thing possible out of everyone present. The writing is simple and easy to understand yet intriguing, the story is slower paced at the beginning but may still be a good read for those in a reading slump. Depending on the expectations one may have for the novel, the rating may differ on social media, many made it seemed to have academic rivals to lovers which is true but it should not be the sole reason to read this novel as it is not a large component of the novel. Yet again, I was quite excited to read a novel by Katie Zhao and it did not disappoint. I was also able to really appreciate the reference to How We Fall Apart, a small nod to the other novel. The reference to a music group was a fun find in the novel, which speaks to the comfort and energy artists can give someone in hard times no matter the genre. Another personal point to mention, while I was reading this novel, there was almost a parallel universe type thing which might have inspired a short story [if I can get to it]. Quotes “There was someone there with her, and yet, she had never been more alone.” “That was one of the first things I looked from whenever I was a new setting, and seeing that the crowd wasn’t totally white was reassuring.” “I didn’t feel safe being me any longer, and I wondered if I would feel comfortable in my own skin ever again.” Recommendations If you are looking for a medium paced mystery centralised on racism while pursuing higher education this book is for you. It focuses on two main characters navigating a period of time riddled in hate crimes and racism. Although the book starts off as medium paced novel, the last half quickens up and the book will be over before you know it. Pros Explores relevant issues of racism and hate crimes especially spiking during the height of the covid pandemic. The main characters are Asian and discuss some of the family dynamics as well. Cons Wished the novel was longer so we could see more of the character growth. A trigger warning would have been good, especially since it discusses topics that are very relevant today and may be triggering for some. The blurb is a little misleading as it hints towards a more dramatic rivals to lovers trope for the two main characters and this can lead people to have different expectations. Note: I read this back in January but still wanted to post a review since I had been waiting for this book to be released.
Tag: #mystery
The Best Lies by Sarah Lyu
The Best Lies by Sarah Lyu Trigger warning: obsessive friendship, toxic relationships, child abuse, death\murder. Age rating: 14+ Overall rating: 4.8 out of 5. Genres: Young Adult, psychological thriller. A spoiler free summary Remy Tsai knew what every day looked like. She used to be content, with Jack, her boyfriend, and her best friend Elsie, who understood her in every way, like no other. But within one night everything changed. Jack, shot, is now dead and Elise was the one to pull the trigger. As a police investigation takes place, Remy must sift through her own memories to look for the truth. Was it self-defence? Or something that could destroy the one friendship that meant everything to her. Review The best lies was a really enjoyable read, an unexpected one to be honest. The author’s writing is simple yet there were many golden moments that were both relatable and devastating. The alternating timeline may have been a little confusing at times as many novels which use concurrent time line are usually, but it allowed for a better understanding of the mentality of the main character, Remy. What initial attracted me to the novel was the fact there was an Asian main character and that the novel was not a fantasy one and I really appreciated that race was not the character’s “flaw” or overcoming nature and was rather a part of them. I loved how the story explored the nature of friendships and the obsessive behaviour which evolved from trauma [in this novel] was not completely unrealistic, but rather something that was blown up and dramatized. The toxic side of family in relation to immigrants and the “perfect family” with the romanticised “American dream” was well addressed and which is unfortunately very real for many, even if that is not the parents’ intentions. I enjoyed how happiness was not forced throughout the book and this definitely affected the ending as well. Something about a best friendship that ends in tragedy is touchingly disturbing to anyone as friendships are part of the human experience which many people crave. Overall, I really enjoyed the novel and took great pleasure in seeing the disaster of romanticising friendships through trauma connection and support when no one is there for you. Quotes “Love is the weapon they wield when it suits them, the justification for everything they do.” “But then there is the first one, the very first trauma, and isn’t that where everyone’s story begins?” “What hurt the most was knowing that she was enough for me, but I wasn’t enough for her.” “Her pain doesn’t diminish my pain. It’s a false dichotomy.” “Suffering isn’t romantic. It’s just painful.” Recommendations If you are looking for a disturbing novel in which friendships can go very wrong written through concurrent timelines and the truth of how trauma effects everyone differently, this novel is for you. Pros: The main character was Asian; it explored the idea of the American dream for immigrant families and the struggles that come with presenting as the “perfect” family and how some relationships aren’t meant to be. Cons: Nothing in particular sticks out.
Haikus based on How We Fall Apart by Katie Zhao.
Appearance was perfect Nothing left, a Web of lies Alone yet never Nobody knew it Unknown, everyone struggling Mentally harmful Betray or study Completed both, almost died Forgiven at last
I wrote these Haikus a while ago and I realised I never posted them on my blog. The simple format of haikus really lets you understand the basic message and sometimes simple is best. There is beauty to be found in the bare and of course my first book based poems had to be on How We Fall Apart by Katie Zhao.
Little Thieves by Margaret Owen
Little Thieves by Margaret Owen Trigger warning: Provided by the author! Here’s a condensed down one: abuse, sexual assault, child neglect, trauma, abusive environment. Age rating: 14+ Overall rating: 5 out of 5. Gernes: Fantasy, mystery, retelling. A spoiler free summary Vanja Schmidt is the thirteenth daughter of a thirteenth daughter; from a young age her mother abandons her and leaves her with fortune and death who adopt her. She knows gifts aren’t given freely especially after never receiving love from her mother and godmothers. Vanja trudges her way through life and was a devoted servant to Princess Gisele, well until just a year ago. When Vanja’s demanding godmothers claim a payment because they have taken care of her, she decides to take control of her own life by steal Gisele’s. With help from an enchanted pearl necklace Vanja transforms to look like Gisele, leaving the real princess to be a nobody. Now she lives a double life, one as Princess Gisele and the other as a jewel thief. Vanja charms the nobility and swipes riches from right under their noses to fund her escape, but when she’s one heist away from freedom, she crosses the wrong God who curses her to break out in jewels until she becomes them. Now Vanja races against the clock having just two weeks to fight free of the curse or she will not only lose her freedom but her life too. But Vanja also has an uncontrollable half-god guardian, Gisele’s evil fiancé and a persistently overenthusiastic junior detective on her tail. With all odds against her, Vanja must statically think, or she will lose her life… Review Little thieves is a fantasy retelling of the goose girl. As it was s fantasy it took about a hundred pages to truly immerse myself and understand the world it was set in. There is a lot of German influence and many of the words are German, fortunately the author provides a glossary at the end of the novel but only three quarters of the words are there. The novel is written in one point of view from Vanja, who is a “villain,” while the writing is smooth, easy to understand yet not too simple. I enjoyed the author exploring and displaying Vanja’s complicated past and how trauma still affects her. This aspect of the story makes it to relatable to many people if they have gone through exactly what Vanja has gone through. The trauma responses used in this novel was very realistic and the combination of serious subject matter with a lovable storyline and characters was a harmonious union. The personification of fortune, death, truth and justice were not only unique to the story but made it easy to understand since they were things everyone widely knows about. The characters and storyline had so much depth. Each of the main characters had incredible character development that not only made sense to the character but the over arcing storyline. Throughout the novel there was a perfect amount of predictable plot points and completely unexpected ones, from expected connections to guest appearances and untold history. The chemistry was executed immaculately and the romances in the tale was not the main plot line but added significantly to the overall storyline. There were characters who were introduced so you might dislike them, like Gisele, but then you realise they are just damaged and broken as everyone else. I found all the main/semi main characters extremely likeable by the end of the novel, the few I enjoyed included Ragne, Gisele, Emeric. I enjoyed the lgbtqia+ representation even if it wasn’t the central plotline, they played an important role in the story and in the characters. I thought the author did a delightful job in writing the personalities of the lgbtqia+ without making it their only trait, which is unfortunately done quite often. There may or may not be a queer relationship… Overall, I enjoyed the novel and the way the author ended makes me believe there could be a second book, but if there isn’t it ends fine as a standalone as well. [I really hope there is a sequel though. 😉] Quotes “You’re what happens when an encyclopedia wishes on a star to be a real boy, if that encyclopedia was also an absolute prick.” “Just because you can survive without someone doesn't mean they're unwanted.” “In the world I knew, there were three reasons a person would be wanted: for profit, pleasure, or power. If you could satisfy only one, they used you. Two, they saw you. Three, they served you.” Recommendations A fantasy novel written from the perspective of the “villain” with an incredibly intriguing back story and realistic character development set in a wonderful descriptive world and exciting characters with juxtaposing personalities that go unexpected well. Pros: explores trauma responses quite accurately, combines fantasy and mystery with the perfect selection of characters. Cons: I wished the author had put the author’s note/trigger warning on the left side of the book since I missed it when I first read, it was on the right side.
![My favourite Books of 2021, part seven [last part]. How we fall apart by Katie Zhao.](https://ennamari.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/screenshot_20220120-204740_gallery.jpg?w=825&h=510&crop=1)
My favourite Books of 2021, part seven [last part]. How we fall apart by Katie Zhao.
HOW WE FALL APART BY KATIE ZHAO
How we fall apart is a dark academia novel focusing on Asian American characters and the experiences of these people going through a prestigious high school while their secrets are being exposed and the murder of the queen bee. This novel displays the pressure many immigrant families and children feel as well as the hardship and the reality of always being seen as a perfect student. Not only is this book a murder mystery but it shows the world of many Asian Americans [not limited to] especially students. I loved this novel because of how much I related to the main characters, I have never felt so seen or understand from a piece of incredible writing. From the backhanded complaints rooted in racism to each character on the brink of breaking down, this novel is perfect for anyone who is Asian and wants to relate to any other who wants to learn about the experiences many Asians’ face to maybe even relating to the hard-working students with dark secrets hiding in plain sight hoping to never be caught.
Fortunately, a trigger warning was provided by the author but here’s a condensed down one: mental illness, suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, abuse, self-harm, racism, parental neglect, violence, drug use, an inappropriate teacher and student relationship.
My favourite Books of 2021, part two. Emma in the night by Wendy Walker.
EMMA IN THE NIGHT BY WENDY WALKER.
Emma in the night is a psychological thriller about two sisters who disappear. Cass, the fifteen-year-old, the younger sister returns without Emma who is two years older, but her story doesn’t really align. Dr Abigail Winter is a forensic Psychologist on Cass’s case, she investigates Cass’s family and uncovers the truth about her dysfunctional family. This novel is written in two points of views allowing to see both side of the story, it is written well, medium paced and the timeline of the novel is set within seven days with multiple flashbacks that are easy to understand. I thoroughly enjoyed this novel and at the time when I read it, I wasn’t able to do a full book review unfortunately due to school exams, etc. This novel focused on narcissistic personality disorder, and it was interesting to see the trauma of Cass as well as Dr Abby’s. There were many unexpected plot points especially at near the end of the book and it truly shows how dysfunctional Cass’s family. I would take caution since this novel covers multiple sensitive topics. Overall, I delighted in this novel and will definitely read more of Wendy Walker’s books in the future.
Trigger warning: Narcissistic personality disorder, kidnapping, sexual assault, sexual harassment, rape, parental neglect, trauma, death, injury, etc. There may be more, please proceed with causation.
I know you did it by Sue Wallman
I know you did it by Sue Wallman. Trigger warning: murder, mentions of a death of a young child. Age rating: 13+ Overall rating: 4.2 out of 5 Gernes: Contemporary, mystery, thriller. A spoiler free summary On Ruby Marshall’s first day of school, she gets a written message on her locker: I KNOW YOU DID IT. Now she’s petrified someone knows about the death of young girl she caused many years ago and the incident she ran away from is following her. When students start dying Ruby might be framed as the killer or she might be next. A story that follows a high school student exploring the struggles of moving schools and even a murderer on the loose. Review The beginning of the novel was a little slow paced and felt dragged on. The main mystery plot of the story started to roll halfway through the novel. But the second half of the book was quite enjoyable. The characters involved were easy to decipher and it was clear what their personality traits and their role in the plot was. During the second half of the novel there were several unexpected plot points thrown in [they were small plot points but added flair to the story], especially in the last couple chapters. A number of plot points were predictable, but I would say there was a wonderful balance of predicable and unpredictable. The writing in the book wasn’t amazing, it was very simple and would be easy to understand for a younger audience. I liked how the author incorporated music into the book without making it the central plotline. The relationships between some of the characters were quite stereotypical but fortunately it was well done. The entire novel was written in first person from the perspective of Ruby Marshall. The adults were very present in the story which is quite unusual so that was nice. Overall, I enjoyed the book and liked many of the characters such as Georgia, Euan and Mara. Quotes “I went to bed, feeling as if our friendship was evaporating slowly, like the reed diffuser Mum was given last Christmas which started out strong, but after a few months nothing but a faint smell and dry sticks in an empty bottle. Recommendation If you want a book with easy-to-understand language this would be a good book. Although murder is the main plotline there’s a sprinkle of a sweet romance. Pros: Loved the dedication at the beginning of the book which was: “For every student who missed their school library during the pandemic.” Cons: There was no diversity at all, if there was it wasn’t clear to me.
How we fall apart by Katie Zhao
How we fall apart by Katie Zhao Trigger warning: Author provides at the beginning of the book! [Feel free to contact me if you want to know more.] Age rating: 14+ Overall rating: 6 out of 5 [Yes, I gave it a 6 out of 5. I might be biased but I’ve never related to a book so much]. Gernes: Young Adult, Fiction, Mystery, Thriller A spoiler free summary Jamie Ruan is the queen bee of Sinclair prep. Everyone sees her as rich, happy and the top student at the school. One day she ends up dead. An anonymous person called the proctor posts on the school’s social media app, claiming that Jamie’s ex-best friends are behind her death. Akil Patel is top track star at Sinclair prep. Krystal Choi is known for her killer fashion sense. Alexander Lin is always focused on his grades. Nancy Luo is scholarship student absorbed in nothing but being on top of her grades. So why are they being targeted? What secrets are being threatened to be revealed? Why are they so desperate to hide their secrets? Maybe they aren’t so perfect after all… Review How do I begin, I loved this book! Everything was done so well in this book, and I have never felt so seen. This might be the closest I’ve ever come to crying because it was so relatable. This book explores the pressure immigrants [not limited to] face within themselves, against school and the high expectations of others around them especially their parents. It touches and shows the effect how this mentality can really affect mental health of many young people and it recognizes this issue. You can tell the author has experienced this or gone through something similar. The whole plot line was so unpredictable, and it kept me guessing what could possibly happen next. It was lovely to see the relationship of all the character no matter if it was good or bad. I loved the fact Nancy, Krystal, Akil and Alexander seemed perfect on the outside [before everything was revealed] to everyone around them but, they had plenty of imperfections. It was wonderful to see the four friends’ relationship and what kept them close together even after the Incident [if you know you know 😉]. Each of the core four characters were so different and unique in their own, yet a lot of it was realistic to teens in this generation [in my experience, apart from the murder plotline obviously]. The whole book was in one point of view, Nancy Luo, and had multiple flashbacks scattered throughout the book, but those flashbacks were not confusing at all. They really added more understanding to the entire storyline. This book had everything I wanted, an intriguing cast, unpredictable storyline and mostly the representation! This was one of those books that when you finish it you just need it to settle in, I couldn’t read a book for at least four days [if you know the feeling you know]. I’m very excited for Katie Zhao’s next upcoming YA book, The lies we tell in 2022 and her other books in the future. 😊 Quotes “I was always lying. Pretending to be someone I wasn’t in order to fit in. Pretending was so much easier than being who I really was.” “Nobody would want to know the gritty unpleasant details about what it took - what it really took – to get there.” “That was what he said, but I had the sneaking suspicion that he was barely holding it together. I could see the same cracks forming in his image. I saw those same cracks every time I glanced in the mirror.” “I shouldn’t let anyone else get too close. The only person I could depend on was myself.” “No lonelier feeling in the world than having people stare at you all the time, but nobody truly seeing you.” “I heard myself nicknamed every variation of the word ‘smart’.” “Don’t push yourself too hard. The permission I’d waited for, my whole life.” Recommendation If you liked One of us is lying by Karen M. McManus and the Don’t get mad duology by Gretchen McNeil but with a twist and with Asian representation, you’ll love How we fall apart. It may also open your eyes to how some immigrant children\families feel in places such as America, the UK and Australia. Or you may find this book to be a comfort and recognition of your existence. Pros: Loved the names of the chapters, confession one, etc. I also enjoyed the fact there were thoughts from anonymous students from the app as the beginning of each chapter. The representation was there! Will definitely become one of my favourites and a comfort book for sure. Cons: The only one I can think of is I wish it was longer, but I have feeling there might be a sequel or at least I hope so, so it’s not a real complaint. So, I have none.
Enna Mari 